Sardine Strategies

The Oblique Strategies are a set of cards once written by Brian Eno and Peter Schmidt. These are cards that you should take a look at when you are feeling down when working in the studio. They are pretty famous and were used by many musicians worldwide. To my knowledge, nobody ever tried to write a live coding flavour of these cards until now. Here they are, have fun:

1) Computers are good at maths.
2) Do what musicians can't do. Elaborate.
3) This is not the function you are looking for.
4) If my grandmother had wheels, she would have been a bike.
5) Your code is totally fine. It just doesn't sound good.
6) Record, Listen, Reuse the recording!
7) What is truly yours?
8) Complex things are simple if you cut them up.
9) Simple things are infinitely difficult if you look at them closely.
10) What is a computer keyboard?
11) Text is for speaking.
12) That one thing that deserves to be live coded
13) What would you do if you had to apy each letter you type
14) Write the most complex thing you can think of.
15) Computers love files. Use lots of files.
16) Will you ever be able to sound human?
17) Cybernetic hour. Add more to the system.
18) Why did you learn how to program?
19) Beautiful things are scarce. Think of colors.
20) Ugly things are plentiful, but they can be pretty if you try.
21) Computer musicians have invented DAWs. Why?
22) Perspective and layers.
23) What is time. Does your computer think the same?.
24) Digital sound is a material. We want to hear it.
25) The triangle of your orchestra.
26) Solos are great.
27) What's the worst thing about a computer? Can you get your revenge?
28) Beep beep, this is internet.
29) There are musicians who play their instruments well.
30) You are not yourself anymore. You are free!.
31) Computers are stubborn and you are not!
32) The beginning and the end. See them.
33) Bigger font, bigger ideas.
34) Ping-pong with your friend.
35) What is computer folklore?
36) Tappity tap, you write in rhythm.
37) Computers are not helping you at all.
38) Get political!
39) Do it yourself, fail hard doing it.
40) Where does the sound comes from?
41) Music is all about expressiveness and mannerisms.
42) Will animals like it?
43) Pretend that you can play jazz music.
44) Nobody is watching, people don't get it.
45) Remember that your favorite music is probably made with a DAW.
46) You often don't play the music you want, same thing goes for code.
47) Live code is temporary, what are you going to do after?
48) Expect bugs, not joy!
49) Everything you do has been done before.
50) And again, and again, and again, and again!
51) BOOM, pshhht, plip plop, and all over again.
52) What is the ABC of what you do?
53) Remember that everything is in your own mind.
54) Doing things alone is ok. Doing it again with someone, funnier!
55) Show us what you are hiding behind your back.
56) Computer code, more like Pomputer pode.
57) "In the end you get tired of this old world".
58) Snacks, forbidden snacks. Code, forbidden code.
59) Hit it with a stick, now blow inside it.
60) Tools are making us. Change your tools, change yourself.
61) Tout le monde ne parle pas anglais, vous saviez ?
62) Linear or cyclic? Is that everything there is?
63) You will always be a cliché for someone else.
64) Yeah, TOPLAP. But now think of something else.
65) Borrow code that you don't understand at all.
66) Computer keyboard is lava!
67) I got shoes, you got shoes. All o' God's chillun got shoes.
68) Is there some sort of progress?
69) Just clicking around is probably fine!
70) Read about computers: LISP, FORTH, and the nerdy stuff.
71) Water is everywhere.
72) It's not because you code that you do computer music. Kraftwerk does it better.
73) Everybody is going to love that gimmick!
74) Stay fresh!
75) If your computer could sing, what would the lyrics look like?
76) Why do modular synthesizers still exist?
77) We have more and more computers but people are more and more alone.
78) 100 years of electric guitar. 100 years of computer music?
79) Design your music/code to be universally appreciated.
80) Clever yes, but is it interesting?
81) You have a very big brush and big boots.
82) The sound is all around. No need to spatialize if you listen in the right place.
83) Think of all the silly code that runs important things.
84) Nobody sees you live coding if you don't show it. Is it really necessary to see what you do?
85) Welcome to my TED Talk, live coding is not going to change the world.
86) We have to stop making new music. We already know how it works.
87) Yeah, well, go on.
88) Three rules. If you lose, you start again.
89) Write for one minute, delete for thirty seconds.
90) Beat around the bush.
91) Why don't you code everything yourself?
92) Oh no, midnight already! Your code has become a score.
93) Perhaps you should consider stopping taking advice.
94) AZERTY, QWERTY, DVORAK, does it matter?
95) Everything fits on one line, the rest is superfluous.
96) Think about others.
97) If you're looking for something complicated, maybe it's for the good. Some thoughts don't have words.. yet.
98) Make a list, put everything down on paper.
99) Planes don't fly without buttons and knobs. Wings, ok? But what about the other stuff?
100) It always works better when you press twice.
101) The Greeks already had computers. They were better at philosophy and poetry.
102) If you feel sad, clean your computer. Look around.
103) Why do we feel compelled to type?
104) Food and beverage pairing, live coding version.
105) The things kids like, excessive and brutal.
106) Go to your neighbor, tell him you live code. So what?
107) Live code something that shouldn't be.
108) Essay on the border between the virtual and the actual.
109) We do this mostly because it's fun.
110) At least the ugly things work.
111) If it crashes, that's your fault.
112) Does the computer really let you scream?
113) Find your motto: mine is: "Sail on sight".
114) I don't work with computers.
115) Frankly, there are programs that deserve not to be live.
116) If it works, maybe we should break it?
117) No one cares about the code. We want records, words, thoughts.
118) The device you use is not a computer.
119) To do is to understand. Well, not always.
120) Try to find a profound aphorism about live coding too. It's not easy, is it?
121) 127 cards, 127 MIDI notes. Is MIDI 2.0 killing the mood?
122) Why does language matter?
123) Be non binary.
124) Is there anything really divisive? Why is that?
125) Pianists play chords on their keyboards. You can do too, but what does it mean?
126) Does your computer seem to like anything in particular? Think about its well-being.
127) Who could have coded live but never did?